Interesting and Humour - page 2390
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It's just that the person who was banning has pediculosis))
Google follows you and reads your mind
One of the dudes at work complained that his spoons are slowly disappearing from the firm's canteen. He has already brought in six, of which only two remain. The rest of the employees came up with a plan:
Everyone who sent him an email had to add at the bottom of the message, in white text (i.e. invisible until it was specially highlighted): 'spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon'.
We did this for a few weeks (he had a GMAIL account) and he gradually started to go crazy: every website he went to showed him ads for spoons and cutlery! He thought Google had started reading his mind...
Google follows you and reads your mind
One of the dudes at work complained that his spoons are slowly disappearing from the firm's canteen. He has already brought in six, of which only two remain. The rest of the employees came up with a plan:
Everyone who sent him an email had to add at the bottom of the message, in white text (i.e. invisible until it was specially highlighted): 'spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon'.
We did this for a few weeks (he had a GMAIL account) and he gradually started to go crazy: every website he went to showed him ads for spoons and cutlery! He thought Google had started reading his mind...
If Google were human
-That's easy," the Burgomaster shrugged. "You see that hill over there? There's a goblin with a grenade launcher on it. And he's firing on the town from time to time. That's the whole problem.
-Yeah, I see. We should kill the goblin...
-What are you saying? -The mayor drew his eyes and waved his hands. -You can't kill a goblin.
-Why? -Astonished the Dwarf. -It's a goblin!
-Yes, it is! If we kill him, the world community will say that this is genocide, and we are racists.
-So what? Let him say what he wants.
-And bring in the troops, -The mayor grimly finished his thought.
. -Hm ... -Half-elf is thinking, -So this asshole is shooting at you with a grenade launcher, and you stand for it and don't dare to fight back?
-Otherwise we would be called the aggressors.
-Well, what if we don't kill the goblin, but chase him away?
-From his hill? Impossible. Then we'd be called invaders.
-Catch him and take away his grenade launcher?
-Expropriators.
-To be locked up with the grenade launcher? All right, don't answer that," said the half-elf quickly, when the burgomaster opened his mouth. An interesting case indeed.
-Kill is forbidden, disarmed, captured, chased away, what else is there to do? Re-educate? That's not our line of work.
-No, it's not... -We'd call in a psychologist for that kind of work. But then the world would accuse us of psychological pressure.
-And of defiling our traditions," the Dwarf added, with a firm shake of his head. "That's a sacred thing for goblins, to shoot grenade launchers at people.
-Well," the mayor exclaimed happily, "you know what I mean.
-And what do we have to do?" the Princess interjected again.
-Take the parcel," sighed the mayor.
-To whom? The goblin?
-Yes, there isn't any food stock on the hill. The goblin will be hungry in an hour, and he'll call a truce and start negotiating. He does that every day. He demands that they bring him food, wine, weapons, and sometimes more... And then, when he's full, he declares that the peace talks have reached a dead end and he has to resume fire. The world community is very sympathetic to him. They think he's principled.
-And if you refuse to provide him with food and weapons...
-Then they'll say we're...
-Okay, okay, we get it," the half-elf waved his hands.
-...and send in the troops, - muttered the burgomaster.
-Well, what do you want us for? You could send one of your own to carry the sack.
-We already did. No one came back.
-Did the goblin kill them all?
-He claims he didn't.
-А...
-And the world believes him.
-А...
-Then they'll say we're provocateurs. You see, it's him, the goblin, who's taking the peace initiative, it's his gesture of goodwill. And if anything goes wrong, it's our fault. Obviously! And you... well, you're kind of outsiders, he might not hurt you.
-Well," Half Elf summed up, "political stuff aside, all we have to do is take the package from the client and deliver it to the client, right? A simple postal quest. The rest is your problem. Right?
-That's right,‖ the mayor confirmed, -so we have a deal?
-It's a deal," nodded the half elf. The mayor sighed in relief.
-May I ask you a question? - Princess raised her hand. - Are you so afraid that world public is going to call you aggressors or militarists or something worse?
-Idiots, - sadly answered the mayor.
(c) bormor
Little Bear )