Interesting and Humour - page 1185

 
muallch:

This brings back memories of last year's duck hunt... Sharing.

DUCKS

There are ducks flying across the sky.
A flock flies in a corner.
I long for them eerily.
They're going South, I know.

They'll spend the winter
In some Chad somewhere,
And I'm in a pile of papers
I'm here shredding for food.

They'll have children to feed,
They'll be waved to
# The sun will always shine on them #
I want the ducks, bitches!

I want to go to the ducks, you bastards!
I want my dream to come true!
I want freedom!
I want wings behind my back!

And I want feet instead of legs!
I want to quack like everyone else!
And I wish I didn't need slippers,
And I don't want any slush!

And that my Nyusya
(She, like me, is a duck)
I'd leave her for a goose,
And I would suffer terribly.

And that I'd fly crying
On the most beautiful day, in summer.
And then I'd be hit, I mean,
in a treacherous, flying, double-edged shot.

My corpse is carried by Bobby,
The master praises him,
My coffin's the duckling's coffin,
The glass is filled to the brim.

They put apples in my belly
And they'll rub the skin with lard
And then they'll eat it, the bastards,
And then they'll sing "Murka"

And then they'll sing another song
about how the ducks are flying.
I don't want to do that. I really don't.
I'm even a little creeped out.

I'd rather buy vodka,
¶ I'd rather drink 24 hours ¶
♪ I know now I'm a duck ♪
I don't need to be a duck!

P.S. Everything in life is awfully shaky.
I want to be a fish!

---

PS. Who the author is, I don't know.

 

:(((


 

Today is Radio Day

 
A parable about money.

Lao did not hear a knock on the door in the noise of the rain and only went to open it when the whole house shook with a violent thumping. At the gate, a strangely dressed man was standing with a drawn mule on his back. He spoke, unintelligible at first, but then, upon seeing the incomprehension, he switched to a language similar to the local one. - I have crossed the mountains. I am tired and hungry. Is it possible for a foreigner to spend the night with you? - He who comes in peace is welcome. Come inside, you'll get food and a bed.

Sleep was sound, and in the morning the traveler saw a blue sky, sunshine and mountain tops. Time to get ready for the journey.
- Goodbye, master. Thank you for the night's lodging. Here you are.
- What is it?
- What is it? It's money.
- I'm sorry, but there's nothing like it around here. Explain to me why you're giving me these items.
- You let me in, fed me, gave me new clothes and food for the road. I give you money for that. He who has a lot of money is the most respected person.
- Thank you, I understand. We don't have such a custom, but I can see he is wise. - Farewell! - May the gods help you!

An hour later, Lao was at the blacksmith's house.
- Make me, master, a hundred disks with my family's insignia on them. My son will help you. The thing is, a stranger came to see me last night and he told me...

And some time later, a custom spread throughout this small country: if someone did something nice to another person, he would give him a silver disc with his family's insignia on it. These discs are kept at home or made into necklaces. And the person who has a lot of money is the most respected person.
 

There are all sorts of difficult-to-pronounce words, such as :

Excessive pinacoidal rhombohedricity

 
- Moisha, where did you get such a cool watch?
- My dad sold it to me when he was dying.
 
muallch:

This brings back memories of last year's duck hunt... Sharing.

Nice beagle. I should have taken a closer picture of the prey.)
 
 
MrGold166:
Nice beagle. You should have taken a closer picture of the prey.)
It's not about the prey. I don't go for game (or fish), I go hunting (or fishing).
 

Once again, the Russian Post has been on fire:

Почта России, новая серия: "Нападение на гниду-клиента"

A PDP employee refused to accept an EMS shipment to Chukotka, verbally stating the reason for the refusal. "The box is taped over, take it off". Called the hotline, explained the situation, they said there was no such requirement. Passed the word to the employee. In reply: go away. We were asked to identify ourselves and ask for a book of complaints, we were kicked out and from that moment the camera was switched on.