Interesting and Humour - page 4180

[Yuriy Zaytsev]

ruslan:
what's with the *** with the nicknames crossed out?

they are God's chosen ones.

p.s.

god is a moderator

crossed out nicknames - sent to the ban.

the bathhouse is a good place to get your mind right.

*** is a well-understood dirty word.

[Alexandr Saprykin]

https://lenta.ru/news/2018/03/09/penguins/

[Alexandr Saprykin]

[Yuriy Zaytsev]

Still our women are the best, it's nonsense to brake a horse on the gallop, meteorites stop it.

[Vitaly Murlenko]

One day a lumberjack was chopping wood over a river and he dropped his axe in it. He cried with grief, but then the Lord appeared to him and asked: - Why are you crying? - How could I not weep, for I had dropped my axe into the river and would no longer be able to earn food for my family. Then the Lord drew a golden axe from the river and asked: - Is this your axe? - No, it is not my axe," replied the woodcutter. The Lord drew a silver axe from the river and asked: - Could this be your axe? - No, and it is not my axe," replied the woodsman. Finally, the Lord drew an iron axe from the river. - Yes, it is my axe," rejoiced the woodcutter. - I see that you are an honest man and keep my commandments," said the Lord, "so take all three axes as your reward. The woodcutter started to live well, but unfortunately his wife fell into the river. Again he wept bitterly. And again the Lord appeared to him and asked: - Why are you weeping? - How could I not weep, for my wife had fallen into the river. Then the Lord took Jennifer Lopez out of the river and asked: - Is that your wife? - Yes, that is my wife," answered the woodcutter joyfully. The Lord got angry: - You lied to me, how could it be? - You see, O Lord," replied the woodcutter, "there has been a little misunderstanding. I would have said it wasn't my wife. Then you would have got Catherine Zeta-Jones out of the river, and I would have said again that she was not my wife. Then you'd get my wife, and I'd say that's my wife. You'd give me all three, and what would I do with them? I wouldn't be able to feed them all, and all four of us would be very unhappy. Moral: When men lie, they do so with dignity and for everyone's benefit.

[Dina Paches]

Vitaly Murlenko:

...

Moral: When men lie, they do it with dignity and for everyone's benefit.

Yeah... that's a real "parable" and a conclusion only in humor. Black.

A stunning piece of "from blondes to blondes" nonsense.

[Vitaly Murlenko]

How to fend off intrusive telephone advertising.

You don't have to swear, tell them off or hang up - it won't make them call you any less. Just answer in a friendly voice: "Hello, your call is very important to us. All our operators are busy at the moment. Please wait until an operator answers. Then you play some soft music and wait for a couple of minutes. After that you will probably hear the ringing tone and you will never get another call from this company.

[Yuriy Zaytsev]

Denis Sartakov:

a dreary unseen tragedy, or whatever...

and there's no point in anything at all.

:) It's about movement. And here's another funny joke.
There's a girl standing there with a placard that says: I know what you want for the fourth time, but I'm sorry, it's already a headache.

[transcendreamer]

Yuriy Zaytsev:

They say you don't have to go to .......

If for P, you can sit in front of the TV and nod.

Why haven't they posted Leningrad yet?

(I deleted the link just in case, just in case...)

google: elections, elections, candidates - ...

[Andrey Dik]

Yuriy Zaytsev:

:) And here's another funny anecdote.
There's a girl standing with a poster, the poster says: I know what you want for the fourth time, but I'm sorry, it's already a headache.

post something about Trump, eh?

With Trump's latest statements (about who has the bigger nuclear button) he's been getting email spam like this:
"Increase your nuclear button by 5cm in just one week! Easy and reliable recipe at the link!"