Interesting and Humour - page 1285

 
Mischek:
YouTube, social networking sites give people the confidence that everyone needs them now.

It's just that confidence is often instilled in people who post crap. And with the proliferation of the internet, you realise how much of it there is...

But it's possible to catch loozles.)))

 
The newlyweds had an accident on their way to church and went straight to heaven to meet God.
- We love each other so much and we want to get married after all," the newlyweds asked him.
- You are the first one here with such a request," God said and disappeared for three weeks. Three weeks later he appeared with a priest who married them. And the newlyweds are not happy again:
- "I don't think there's any need for marriage in heaven. Can't we get a divorce?
- Don't give me a hard time! It took me three weeks to find a priest in heaven! Do you have any idea how long it takes to find a lawyer in heaven?!
 

What was the correct explanation of the accident after the collision with the Hummer car ! (Read it sitting up!) I, my name, was driving on a scooter Gilera Fuoco 500 at __.__.__ in the direction of Red Army Ave. I was not breaking the rules, I was following the traffic situation. At the intersection with Berounskaya street unexpectedly for me and other traffic participants a black Hummer without a properly installed number plate was stopped at a red light. I, realising the danger and avoiding an accident, was forced in braking into the oncoming traffic lane, where I stopped on the roadside. In the process of braking, manoeuvring and stopping I heard a strong bang from behind. Having turned round, I saw, that car #Hummer had struck the car #Suzuki Jimny (registration number ______) following me in the same direction, practically having torn off a cowl space. Having noticed a girl at the wheel of the injured Suzuki Jimny, I went to give her possible first aid. As I approached the car I noticed a child in a child seat in the back seat. I opened the boot of the injured car, got the child (a boy about 4 years old) through the trunk, took the same emergency stop sign, set it and through the window of the driver's door helped the girl-driver to get out. After escorting her and the child to the curb and making sure they were not seriously injured, I asked the driver of the Mitsubishi Airtrek, licence plate number ______, who had also stopped to help, to call an ambulance and the traffic police. I then approached the Hummer solely to see if its driver needed my help. Through the open window of the Hummer I saw two persons, obviously from the South. Dark skin, curly stiff hair and distinctive facial features were evidence of this. I assumed that they were lost Spanish tourists and in a friendly manner asked them in their own language if they had noticed the red traffic light - Al huele pido rosa (I had learnt Spanish at the school of the Soviet Embassy in Madrid, where my father worked as a driver). In response, the driver of the Hummer, through the open window of his car, hit me in the head with his left hand. Since I had not removed my helmet, which I am obliged to wear under the traffic regulations, the impact was felt on my helmet. This explains the broken 4 fingers on his left hand. Then he jumped out of the car and hit the head with his right hand. That would explain the fracture in the radius. A passenger who then jumped out of the same car hit me on the back with some heavy object, and I didn't engage in physical combat with him, but simply laid him carefully on the pavement and began to wait for the traffic police to arrive, like a law-abiding citizen. He didn't cause me any damage, as I was wearing a motorbike outfit, more commonly known as a "turtle", underneath my jacket. His broken nose and jaw could be explained by the fact that the airbags did not deploy at the moment of impact of the Hummer with the Suzuki Jimny, and he has injured himself on the front panel of the car. I cannot say anything about the torn to shreds official ID of Assistant Deputy of Makhachkala Council of Deputies under the name of ...FIO...., as I do not know it. I also do not know how the torn official ID could end up in the mouth and gullet of the Hummer's driver. I cannot say anything about the group of citizens on motorbikes and scooters gathered around the accident scene as I do not know these people at all. I also know absolutely nothing about who cut all wheels of Hummer car, who drove a crowbar through its roof, who broke all glasses and cut a leather saloon, thus making it unusable and with the already mentioned crowbar turned the already damaged bonnet and damaged the engine. The truthfulness of my words can be confirmed by witnesses and participants of the accident, for example drivers of car Mitsubishi Airtrek, number plate number ______ and car Suzuki Jimny. Date __.__.2012. Подпись_________(___________)





 

Annual report of the president and members of the government to the State Duma

 

That's who pantural is :)))

 
peripatetikos:
..... Do you have any idea how long it takes to find a lawyer in paradise?!
It's a mess, just like everywhere else.
 

Mr36monkey 20 sec ago

GUYS EVERYTHING WORKS! PUMPED MYSELF UP WITH GLYCODINE, USED THE WICHMASTER TO BEAT OFF THE DHM. BROTHER ALIVE, WRITING FROM THE EIGHTH PLATEAU
Reply -





Mikhail Ivanov 3 min. ago

It really works! My wife had a headache every night, I downloaded the noshpa and offered the disc to my wife! She was gone the same day!!! Now I have a new wife: younger, prettier and more debauched than the previous one.

 

nice.)

 
I need help!!! Or maybe I got a virus... I don't know exactly... My computer freezes... I had a virus like this once... But I had to change the wind system... How can I check it out without changing the wind system?
 

pretty much.

Reason: