Interesting and Humour - page 1741
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Autumn is here. Birds fly south, leaves rustle underfoot and ripe bulbs fall on your head.
Autumn is here. Birds fly south, leaves rustle underfoot and ripe bulbs fall on your head.
Aha...
The crows are flying south,
Birds have stopped pecking..,
Autumn is here... Fucking hell...
Autumn is here. Birds fly south, leaves rustle underfoot and ripe bulbs fall on your head.
A harsh Russian autumn).
iTank by Apple:
1. stylish white tank with futuristic design, rounded edges, apple on the turret.
2. gets outdated faster than it drives.
3. costs as much as 20 Chinese equivalents, but unlike them cannot fly and fry fritters.
3. shells to 1.99, 5.99 and 9.99 euros.
4. when trying to enter the hangar, it can zero out the ammunition, drain the fuel and cut off the legs of the tank commander, who can then be bought for 29.99.
5. when inspecting not at the manufacturer, you can be told that this is not a tank at all, but a tank with a sprat. to turn the tank back into a tank is possible for 29.99.
6. when trying to fill not the native fuel, cuts off the tank commander not only legs, but also hands.
7. When buying, you are enrolled in a cult, exit from which is fraught with death.
Tank on Android
1. tank as a tank, angular, made of cheap materials. colours to choose from: black, light black and dark black.
2. never goes where it should.
3. offers a choice of 250 different free sets of crew: 200 of them deaf-mute, 40 can not drive this tank. the remaining 10 constantly begging for money, fainting and suffering seizures.
4. fuel is constantly going somewhere
5. after maintenance check and replacement of parts, it can shoot back into the turret, after which it cannot be restored.
6. it is possible to hitch a torch to the muzzle, change the colour of the interior, change the gender of the crew.
7. during replacement of the engine with a newer one, there is a 70% chance of explosion of ammunition and a 100% chance of injury to the entire crew.
Tanks on Windows mobile
1. it's actually an aircraft carrier.
2. but it doesn't float.
3. but rides like an aircraft carrier.
4. the crew is the same, but the problems are new every time.
5. the tank commander can only be of two types: shell-shocked and deaf-mute.
6. randomly cripples the crew, bends the muzzle, drains fuel, shoots at his own people.
7. before the repair works disgustingly, after repair never works.
Chinese tanks.
1. come in all types and sizes of colours, but unfortunately not at the moment.
2. are worth as much as new trainers.
3. the crew does not understand Russian, at the attempt to teach Russian is trying to shoot themselves.
4. shoots, but not there. rides, but not as it should. can fly, but you can not control it. fries pancakes, but not as it should.
5. After two weeks it no longer works.
6. has no warranty
7. requires replacing everything that can be replaced.
7. After the road inspection it turns out that the module is entirely made of plywood with stones poured inside for extra weight but no one can say how it works.
Unix tanks.
1. You are sent a box.
2. In the box is a spanner, a file and a 1600-page manual...
...on how to build a death star.
4. You get a scooter.
5. You keep fixing the scooter for the rest of your life
If tanks were made by modern software developers and hardware manufacturers
Elena Mizulina suggested that the "special role of Orthodoxy" be enshrined in the Constitution
Well, that's where it's going. Although some would strongly disagree.