Traders joking, the beginning - page 621

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Hillary said she doesn't like selfies because the interaction is very impersonal. She said, "If anything is going to be impersonal on this campaign trail, I prefer it to be me."
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The president of Mexico announced that the notorious drug lord El Chapo has been caught. So good news everybody — Mexico is completely safe again!
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At the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas this week, a company debuted a drone that can carry a person. People were like, “So... A helicopter? It’s been done.” “Oh this will take ya right up in the air!” And the company was like, “AH CRAP!”
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Due to pressure from animal rights groups, Ringling Bros. Circus has announced they will end their elephant show in May. When told, the elephants said, "Great — looks like it’s back to stripping for us."
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A day after he was caught, it came out that Mexican drug lord El Chapo actually sat down for an interview with Sean Penn while he was on the run. In the interview, El Chapo described himself as “a person who's not looking for problems in any way.” You know, except for that whole “Mexican drug lord” thing. “I’m just a humble drug lord! I chop up my enemies one leg at a time, just like anybody else.”
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