Traders joking, the beginning - page 564

[tim079]

....................

[seekers]

Two cows are sitting in a field, and one says to the other, “so, how about that mad cow disease? Scary stuff, right?” To which to other replies, “terrifying. But what do I care? I’m a helicopter.”

[tim079]

.........................

[seekers]

A top aide to Donald Trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of Trump's public feuds, but Trump said he was fired. When asked what he was fired for, Trump said, “Quitting!”

[tim079]

...................

[seekers]

A new report claims that William Shakespeare was a marijuana user and may have been high when he wrote some of his plays. Which explains that one line: “To be, or not to be . . . Wait, what was the question?”

[tim079]

....................

[seekers]

A PAC supporting Hillary Clinton just received an anonymous donation of $1 million. Which means that if she wins any of us can say that it was us that gave her the million bucks and hit her up for a favor.

[tim079]

.......................

[seekers]

Hillary Clinton pushed back against Donald Trump's claim that she went to his wedding because of his donations and said she actually attended because she thought, "It'd be fun." Added Hillary, “Am I saying that right — Fun?”