Traders joking, the beginning - page 447

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Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush said today that he has not yet decided whether he will run for president in 2016 — at which point Hillary Clinton took her foot off of his neck.
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A commercial supply ship bound for the International Space Station has exploded moments after liftoff...but Obama had nothing to do with it...he was playing golf at the time...

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Dominican officials arrested a woman for trying to smuggle over $69,000 in a briefcase and more than $70,000 in her stomach. When asked what she was planning on using the money for, she said, “To buy a second briefcase.”
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President Obama and Michelle Obama went to a parent-teacher conference at their daughters' school this week. The teachers say their daughters are doing well, but with a few billion more in education funding, they could be doing great.
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Cosmo magazine is encouraging female students in North Carolina to vote by offering a party bus to the voting polls that includes shirtless male models — just as our forefathers intended.
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The man in charge of investigating the 2012 Secret Service prostitution scandal has quit after he himself was caught with a prostitute — which explains why President Obama just appointed an irony czar.