Traders joking, the beginning - page 408

 

President Kennedy said let's put a man on the moon, and by God, 10 years later we put a man on the moon. Yesterday was the 45th anniversary. Nowadays a big deal for us is we combined the croissant and the doughnut to get a cronut.

 

Clinton's wish for world peace

Clinton is on the beach at Martha's Vinyard and finds that an old bottle has washed ashore. When the Prez opens it a very wan Genie snakes out.

Genie: Hi Bill. I'm a very weak genie, so I can only grant you one wish--it had better be easy if you want me to do it.

Clinton: I pray for world peace. Give me that.

Genie: That's a little hard, give me something easier.

Clinton: Make Hillary into the most beautiful woman in the world?

Genie: World peace it is.

 

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HAMAs just shot an Israeli airplane and took pilot hostage!!! https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=710883432321894&set=vb.119605611449682&type=2&theater

 

Top George Bush Slogans

I'll turn capital punishment into a new game show!

I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time.

I'll finish what Bill started -- the interns.

Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right?

Vote for the GOP, Not OPP.

I promise no sex scandal: just look at me.

New penal plan: I won't use mine!

Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks.

George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers

Vote for Bush and against Common Sense.

 

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Netflix is testing a new feature that will allow you to hide what you've been watching. You just click the button and it says, I want to stay married.
 

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Teacher: "Kids,what does the chicken give you?"

Student: "Meat!"

Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"

Student: "Bacon!"

Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"

Student: "Homework!"

 
A JetBlue pilot was arrested this week and charged with heroin possession. Passengers could tell something was up when, during their flight, he announced, "To your left you'll see the Grand Canyon, and to your right you'll see a fire-breathing dragon."
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