Traders joking, the beginning - page 405

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Bill and Hillary were going down a back road and stopped at a gas station.

As the worker was filling up their car, he said to Hillary "I went to high school with you". She recognized him and agreed with him.

Later as they were driving down the road Bill said "If you had married him you wouldn't be married to the President".

Hillary said "Oh yes I would--he would be President."

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Supposedly G.B. Shaw once sent Winston Churchill some tickets for the first night of one of his plays.

Churchill then sent Shaw a telegram to the effect: "Cannot come first night. Will come second night if you have one."

Shaw promptly replied: "Here are two tickets for the second night. Bring a friend if you have one."

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A major wildfire in northern California is being blamed on marijuana farmers. Everyone in the region's really angry about it – unless they're downwind, then they're totally cool.

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a glimpse...than wink...what's next?

The Associated Press @AP · 6m

BREAKING: US officials: Intel suggests Malaysia plane shot down by separatists, no link to Russia found.

BREAKING: US intelligence official says shootdown of MH17 may have been a 'mistake'

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President Obama was giving an interview recently, and get this, he said he thought that Joe Biden would be a good president. When asked why, he was like, "Because he'd make me look AMAZING."