Traders joking, the beginning - page 352

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Tiger Woods pulled out of the Masters. He's got a pinched nerve in his neck. It's really a problem. It starts in his neck, and then radiates down through the shoulder all the way down his check-writing arm.
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House Budget Committee Chairman Paul Ryan just released his budget proposal for 2015. Of course, a lot of people are criticizing it. For example, during a speech yesterday President Obama referred to the budget as a “stinkburger” and a “meanwich.” Ryan called Obama immature, while Chris Christie called to see if he had any more of those stinkburgers or meanwiches.
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George W. Bush opened an art exhibit at his presidential library that features portraits he painted of various world leaders. He was going to include a painting of bin Laden, but he couldn't find it.
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Chris Christie, what a guy. He allegedly closes down the George Washington Bridge. Everybody goes crazy. And he says, "I'll handle this. I'm going to investigate myself." So he investigates himself. He finds out that he, in fact, is innocent. He came up with a classic defense, "If the pants don't fit, you must acquit."
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