[Archive c 17.03.2008] Humour [Archive to 28.04.2012] - page 551
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The accident happened around 4:30 p.m., Interfax was told by the press service of the Moscow underground. According to RBC, a man fell on the tracks in front of the incoming train. Another passenger tried to help him and jumped onto the tracks. The train managed to brake without causing any harm. Circle line traffic is now fully restored.
Good thing not everyone jumped...
Given:
1. A shattered Moskvich 412 in orange - no - ORANGE. Age the same as me, but in a much worse state of disrepair.
It squeaks and farts, but it drives.
2. BMW 530i. Not as flashy as an orange Moscvich, of course, but impressive.
3. baseball cap, black sunglasses (for not recognizable).
The essence of the experiment:
Looking for a pretty girl walking on the pavement. One or two (it does not matter). Then a Moskvich car is driven up to her.
The driver drives up, blah-blah-blah about the weather, health, mood and then an offer is made to take her for a ride.
Out of the 15 girls I have chosen, 14 of them refuse to get in Moskvich. (different excuses - I'm in a hurry, I'm late, my friends are waiting for me - I'm going to my mum and dad's place to study).
After the refusal, the Moskvich drove away and turned around.
The driver gets in his BMW, takes off his baseball cap and glasses, changes his jacket and rides up to these same girls with the same conversation.
Out of 15 girls, only one recognises the driver. (and only because he forgot to take off his baseball cap).
Of the 15 girls, 14 agreed to get into the car. Those who agreed to take the Moskvich Bechu were not offered any more
The average time from the moment of the stop till the getting into the car did not exceed 80 seconds. The girl who was in a hurry to go to the hospital was especially quick to accept the offer.
Once the girl was in the car, the experiment went into the "tough bummer" phase.
- Young lady, you know, if you refused to drive with me in Moskvich 5 minutes ago, you would not be interested in driving with me in Bechka.
You should have seen their eyes at that moment......I guess for them it looked like a white horse's arse on which the prince is riding away
Criteria for choosing female respondents:
1. Age between 20 and 30.
2. Sympathetic
3. Sexuality
4. Grooming.
5. Well-dressed.
Conclusion:
In an urban setting:
1. It doesn't matter what a man looks like, what he wears or what he says.
2. It matters how much money a man has and what he drives.
==========
Upd. In answer to the questions about the girl who got into the Moscovitz.
She got a bonus. A bouquet of 15 roses. It was originally planned that one rose would be given to each person who agreed to ride in the Moscovitch.
The dialogue with the consenting girl was like this:
She was asked:
-Why did you get in the car?
She said:
- I liked you.
- And what, even an orange Moskvich doesn't matter?
- What difference does it make what kind of car if you like someone?
After that, she was given all 15 roses
Go to that bank and take out a safe deposit box for a year (you'll have to go broke).
Better yet, get a couple of friends to buy a few more boxes.
You buy a frozen fish (with giblets) and put it in a tray.
It's pretty airtight, and the slop won't leak.
According to the terms of the agreement, the bank cannot open your box during the entire term.
Moreover, it is also difficult to determine the source of the stench if there are several fish in different places in the deposit box.
After a year you can send a written permission to break the contract, if your feelings of revenge have been satisfied.
It is not a good idea to go to the bank in person.
They say it is the Italian way and it has been tried in real life.